Hi everyone, i'm about to write my first book a plot i've been cooking up for almost 10 years, and i wanted to show at least a part of it so you guys can tell me if im heading into the right direction as far as the writing goes, any advice can help me, also bear in mind that english is not in fact my first language it was more of an autodidact effort and i wanted to write the book in english because it would be more of a challenge, but i'm rambling too much. The next part is a dream sequence in which a main character sees a future event with other main characters:
She was on her knees watching with terror and awe the scenery, the vast blue and bright sky couldn't completely reveal the shapes around her, everything and everyone seemed like a blur.
Stone giants with thousands of reflecting eyes were guarding vigilant without moving or even noticing her, like her existence didn't even mattered, monsters made of metal with various sizes, forms and colors were on fire and yet they didn't made a sound, the bodies of hundreds lying in different positions extended as far as the eye could see. And on the center was a shadow, the obscure shape of a person, standing, watching the scene raising his arms like this was the presentation of a macabre show welcoming the audience. The silence was abrupted by a deep laughter, something in that laugh paralyzed her, the desire of running as far away as she could started emerging at that moment, but her legs wouldn't answer any commands and the shaking on the tip of her fingers spreaded throughout her entire body.
As the shadow turned around, facing her, she noticed the entire shape of the monster, he was wearing the royal captains clothes: a black long coat with wide lapel, shoulder capes and a hood, she tried to see beyond that hood, seeing if at least could recognize the face of this demon, yet she couldn't see anything under it, only darkness, while the shadow started walking in her direction, she tried screaming for help but it made no difference, no sound could be heard and it was getting closer to her with ever second, as the only sound that now could only be heard was her own heartbeat, beating more violently with every step of the monster until it stopped right in front of her, they both were gazing at each other, trying to uncover their intentions, a tear started flowing through her face and yet, she was not the one crying, she couldn't help feel sorrow for this killer.
As the figure started reaching her hand towards her revealing a ebony claw gauntlet dripping with blood, thats when the panick started again, she wanted to say that he didn't have to do this, and yet still the hand reached her, as she started feeling the cold sensation of the wet metal hand clasping tight on her neck, each passing moment with more strenght as the blood of the gauntlet ran through her neck, the terror settled in as she couldn't breath anymore, realizing this was the end , the lack of air, was making her dizzy, she was feeling her own demise as a loud shriek echoed in the distance that made the shadow loosen his grip on her, he turned around to see his new victim and suddenly the hand released her, she tried making sense on what was going on, the only thing she was able to see was while falling to the ground, was what it looked like a giant majestic bird with golden wings and a crown of fire floating on his head charging against the shadow,while they collided a flash of red stuck her eyes , and the maniacal laughter of the demon echoing in her ears, her head struck the ground and eveything turned into a pitch dark..